


right side of rock bottom [and to you I just keep crawling]

by echo_wolf



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-15
Updated: 2016-04-15
Packaged: 2018-06-02 11:52:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6565057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/echo_wolf/pseuds/echo_wolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The story where nothing remarkable was supposed to happen to Lexa Woods, but then Clarke Griffin happened. </p><p>Or the Notting Hill AU where Clarke Griffin might as well have fallen out of the sky</p>
            </blockquote>





	right side of rock bottom [and to you I just keep crawling]

**Author's Note:**

> The title is derived from [Rock Bottom by Hailee Steinfeld](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B8m8I24jEAA)

***

_New sci-fi flick set in futuristic Polis to hit theatres this month!_

***

"Lex, you got this?" Anya questions, her hand already on the door. "I'm going to grab us something from the café."

Lexa nods, pushing her glasses up with a finger, but not looking up from the financial books when the shop door opens and shuts. She's vaguely aware of the idiot customer asking if they take Bed, Bath and Beyond coupons who has just left when she doesn’t as much bat an eyelash at him. There's silent one who looks rather capable of stealing something near the back collections. There's someone else in the shop, which piques her interest for some unknown reason- some other reason than someone seriously shopping for candles in the vanilla section who isn't Lexa herself.

When Lexa gathers the courage to offer her expertise, her voice is lost upon her at the woman's undeniable beauty-- even with the oversized sunhat. She pushes her glasses up the bridge of her nose, blinking rapidly in an effort to make herself believe she's still alive and that she's not seeing things. This customer looks… _familiar_ , like she's seen her before a million times. But Lexa can't quite place a face to a name, but that’s when she decides to open her mouth.

"Can I help you find anything?"

The woman smiles, turning to Lexa's direction briefly- a moment Lexa steals to admire blue eyes- before shaking her head and answering politely. "No, thanks. I'm just looking."

Lexa notes the Very Vanilla Blossom candle from the Mt. Weather company in the woman's hand. She hates that particular scent along with everything made from the company, but Anya argued they would be 'good enough' for stock and Lexa couldn't really argue with their mild popularity amongst casual candle customers. (That, unfortunately, describes most of the customers that come into the shop). And, of course, her visceral hate gets the better of her.

"You don't want that one." Lexa blurts out and the woman raises an eyebrow at her. And that only causes Lexa to keep talking. "Uh, well, I mean, Mt. Weather scents are obviously more manufactured than, say, the candles from Trikru." She points to the small collection directly next to the Mt. Weather display. The woman silently follows with her eyes. "Those actually use natural oils, so the scents are powerful, but, you know…" Lexa pulls a face. "...not overwhelming…or fake... for a candle. "

A small smile forms on the woman's face before she responds to Lexa-the-Bumbling-Mess-in-front-of-Pretty Girls. "I'll keep that in mind. Thanks."

There's a noise from the back wall that catches Lexa's attention. She immediately checks the security camera, showcasing that, as she suspected, the silent customer from earlier placing a small candle in to his pants of all places. Sighing, she turns to the customer. "If you'll excuse me…"

She confronts the man in the back. "Either you put the candle back or I call security."

He tries to play the fool. "What candle?"

Lexa sighs again. "Tell you what, I'm going to call the police and if they find that I was wrong, then my deepest apologies in advance. Okay, mate?"

When Lexa emerges from the back room, just getting off the phone with Polis Market Security, she finds the thief approaching the woman from earlier.

"Can I get your autograph?" He says, pulling out a small pocket book and a pen, as if he wasn't just trying to steal a candle five minutes prior. 

Of course, she's famous. Lexa should've known.

The woman offers a forced smile. She takes the items and asks. "Who do I make this out to?"

He responds, smirking while doing so. "My friends call me Wick."

This idiot would spend all his time hanging out in a candle shop with a stupid name like that.  Lexa has to unclench her fists and cross her arms over her chest instead.  She watches as the woman scribbles into the pocket book.

When he gets his stuff back, he asks what it says. She simply replies. "Wick, you belong in jail. Clarke."

Finally having enough common sense to feel embarrassed, he quickly takes his leave. So, Lexa can wait for the woman named Clarke to finish up her shopping in peace.

"Let me ring you up." Lexa offers, making her way behind the cash register. She scans each of the items. "Ah, so you decided on the Very Vanilla Blossom candle. Natural oils are overrated anyway." She reaches under the cashier desk and pulls out a TriKru's Sugar Blossom candle. "I'll throw this one in for free."

The woman throws her a smile. "Thanks." She pays her total, and leaves the shop.

Lexa watches her go, not quite believing Clarke Griffin just walked into her shop.

***

The rest of the day passes slowly, like the ordinary trajectory that Lexa expects.

"An?"

"What?" Anya pokes her head out from behind the back shelf.

"Do you think anyone famous would walk in here?"

Her friend rolls her eyes and scoffs at her. "Right…in the middle of bloody outback? Sounds like you need some fresh air, Lex."

Lexa shakes her head, internally reminding herself of Clarke Griffin from earlier. She simply agrees with her business partner. "No, you ought to be right."

"I told you these candle scents would start getting to your head eventually." Anya sighs, rearranging the forest scents in the corner. "Hey, since you need some air. Get me an OJ, yeah?"

"Maybe you should stand next to the fruit scents and save us a dollar?"

Lexa doesn't need to look back to know that Anya's flipping her off. She makes her way out of her shop and into the Polis Street Market. She meanders, a little more than she usually does, weaving between people and the market stands after grabbing Anya's orange juice. When she turns the main street corner, she collides with someone and spills orange juice all over them.

"Oh, shit. I'm so sorry!" Lexa tries to apologize, but the only response she gets is an angry outburst.

"Hey! Idiot! Watch where you're fucking going!" The voice is familiar, though rough and furious. She tries to help by wiping up whatever she can on the woman, right down the front of her shirt. But that just causes even more backlash, much to Lexa's chagrin. "Watch your hands." The woman snatches the napkins from her hands. "Fuck."

And that's when Lexa finally gets a good look at her. It's Clarke Griffin. Lexa offers the only thing she can at the moment. "My house is walking distance from here and you can get cleaned up."

"I just need to get to my car." She curses again as she looks around, unable to figure out where she is. "Fuck. Okay, you said walking distance. How far is that? In yards or something, please!"

"About 25. My house is right there." Lexa answers. She points to her house across the intersection. "The one with the blue door." They practically run into Lexa's house, the brunette clearing the hallway, as it's littered with all of Octavia's gym equipment, for Clarke to pass. She points to the door down the end of the hall. "The bath's right there. There's a sink, shower, towels. Everything you ought to need to get cleaned up."

Clarke nods and disappears behind the door. Lexa's putting away Octavia's dishes from last week into the sink when Clarke emerges in an entirely new outfit, ill-fated white shirt replaced with a black  one, the sunhat now a baseball cap and the previous sunglasses switched with a pair of aviators. Lexa tries not to stare…too hard.

"Everything all set?"

Clarke gives her a tight-lipped smile. "Actually, do you have a phone? My cell died."

"Uh, yeah." Her mother forced her to get a landline because one can never be too sure apparently in this day and age. She'll have to thank her mother for that at some point. "Yeah, it's in the lounge room." Lexa leads her over to the sofa where the phone base is stationed on the adjacent side table. "I'll, uh, leave you to it, then."

She busies herself in the kitchen again until her phone goes off.

Anya Reyes [4:55pm]: you owe me two oj's tomorrow! you ditched me at closing!

Lex [4:55pm]: I can come back?

Anya Reyes [4:56pm]: TWO OJs!

Lex [4:57pm]: Okay.

Anya Reyes [4:58pm]: also you answer to raven as to why i'll be home late tonight

Lex [4:59pm]: Yes, ma'am.

Clarke clears her throat and Lexa's head snaps up. "My car's here. I should get going. Thank you…for your, uh, help."

"It's the least I can do after the whole orange juice fiasco." Lexa scratches the back of her head. "Which, again, bloody sorry."

Clarke chuckles. "I'll just be on my way."

"You sure I can't offer you anything else?" Lexa suggests as she opens the fridge, internally cringing that her and Octavia don't actually keep a well-stocked fridge. "Tea? Coffee?" She spots a carton in the back of the shelf. "Orange juice?" Clarke shoots her a glare, and she grimaces. "Right, of course not. How about some food? Jam" Clarke shakes her head. "Fruit?" Lexa knows Octavia's always stocked up on fruit, of all things.

"No, thank you."

"Biscuits? I hear you Americans are quite keen on Tim Tams."

Clarke tries to hold back a smile. "No."

"Are you keen on saying anything other than no?"

The blonde stares at her, cracking a smile before responding. "No."

Lexa smiles at her. "I guess I won't keep you, then."

Before any of them can say anything else, Octavia bursts through the door behind them. She's hauling some bags of groceries. "Coming through! A mate of a mate got me a sweet discount on oysters, you know, the most reliable aphrodisiac. You think you can make yourself scarce tomorrow night? I've got a conquest and, dare I say, she's quite keen." Octavia's already heading up the stairs before she can notice Clarke standing before Lexa.

Lexa sighs. "I'm really sorry for my flatmate. There's just no excuse for her."

"That's my cue to leave. For real this time." Clarke states, pointing her thumb to the front door behind her.

"Right." Lexa picks up her bags and hands them to the blonde. "Here you go."

She walks Clarke to the door, but before Lexa can reach for the doorknob, Clarke is leaning in and pulling her in for a kiss. There's a tinge of heat between them, allowing the possibility for _more_ , but Lexa's brain has long floated to cloud nine to act on it before Clarke pulls back.

Clarke lets out a shaky breath as she bids Lexa farewell, turning to let herself out. "Bye."

Lexa is left without so much of a breath when the door shuts and Octavia's barreling down the stairs again.

Octavia's zooming around the kitchen, not really paying any mind to notice that Lexa's in some trance by the door. "Hey, Lexapedia, you up for a movie night? I picked up a bunch of classics."

Lexa lets out a sigh of relief. Octavia's as observant as Lexa is able to see without her glasses.

***

_Clarke Griffin in Polis to promote new sci-fi flick!_

***

Despite the one day that falls out of ordinary for Lexa, her life falls back into the ordinary pace she's used to. She tends to her candle shop, her pride and joy, with Anya by her side. She even jokes that they could probably take down Mt. Weather together, but Anya tosses bubble wrap at her when she does.

She watches Octavia try to occupy herself out of the risk of falling victim to boredom and recklessness. Lexa knows from personal experience that a restless Octavia Blake is a force to be feared. It's how Lexa had to learn how to fix drywall when Octavia bought them matching Japanese katanas in the argument that two women in Polis (Market) shouldn't live so...defenseless. They still have the katanas, but in the comfort of Lexa's hallway closet and nowhere near Octavia.

It's not for another few days that Lexa notices that the landline has been eerily too quiet. No phone calls. No messages. She's not sure why it irks her so much, but she brings it up to Octavia one morning over breakfast.

"Hey, O, have there been any messages?"

Octavia stops shoveling banana bread into her mouth for a moment, allowing herself to chew and swallow the food she's devouring. "Yes."

Lexa refrains from rolling her eyes at her younger flatmate. It would only cause her a bigger headache anyway. "Any of them for me?"

"Mama Woods demands a phone call in the near future. She thinks she has some considerable prospects for your love life and her future grandchildren." Octavia grins as Lexa shudders.

"Anything else?"

"What am I, your bloody secretary? I am trying to enjoy some brekky here."

Now she rolls her eyes and tosses a piece of fruit at the younger girl. "Forgive me if I need to know if anything important comes up."

Octavia devours another banana bread before speaking again. "Actually, now that you mention it. There was some American girl named Clarke—"

"—What?—"

"—Yeah, I know right?" Octavia shrugs. "Who's mad as snakes to name their kid, Clarke?"

"No, I mean. Clarke called?"

Octavia side-eyes her flatmate. "So, you are expecting to hear from _someone_."

"Expecting? Nah." Lexa clears her throat and sips her tea, avoiding eye-contact.

"Sure. Good on ya, mate."

Lexa gives in. "Okay, so maybe I was hoping—"

"—Fucking knew it!"

Lexa sets her tea down. "Okay, O, did she say anything?"

"Just to ring her back at the Tower." Octavia explains with a mouthful of bread.

"That's it?" Lexa asks, already out of her seat to seek out the phone. "You're sure?"

"She said to ask for a different name." Octavia furrows her eyebrows. "Poor girl, doesn't even want to keep her name."

Lexa has the phone in hand, dialing for the operator. "Yes, hi. The Tower, please. Thank you." She turns to Octavia at the kitchen table. "What name was it?"

"I don't remember." Octavia says. Lexa wants to vault across the living room and strangle the girl. "It was a bloody cartoon character or something."

_"I'm sorry, ma'am. There is no one booked with us under the name Clarke Griffin."_

"You don't understand. My flatmate can't seem to remember the name left on the machine."

_"I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to help you."_

"Flinstone!" Octavia announces victoriously.

Lexa sighs, rubbing her hand over her face. "There wouldn't happen to be a...Flinstone?"

_"I'll put you right through."_

Her eyes widen, definitely not expecting that to actually work. Realization washes over her as the line continues to ring. She hasn't got a damned clue as to what she's going to say. And she doesn't have very much time to mull over pleasantries.

Clarke's voice sounds clear over the phone. _"Hello?"_

"Hello. Hi. This is Lexa Woods. "

 _"Yes…?"_ Of course, she doesn't remember.

"I, uh, was the tosser who spilled orange juice all over you. I live in Polis Market and own the candle shop."

There's a chuckle and a playful response. _"Is this what you tell all the girls when you don't return their call after three days?"_

Lexa scratches the back of her neck. "Yeah, nah. I blame my flatmate who decided to listen to the message but not tell me about it. As I had explained the day we met, there's absolutely no bloody excuse for her."

Octavia whoops from the kitchen table, pumping her fist.

 _"I guess I have no choice but to take your word for it, Lexa Woods."_ There's some noise in the background and a pause before Clarke continues. _"Would you free to drop by this afternoon?"_

"Oh, uh." Lexa sputters for a moment before taking a breath. "Yeah. I can...drop by."

 _"Great. I have to go now, but just head up the elevator to the Dante Suite…333A...you can't miss it."_ There's more noise, but less of a pause this time. _"I'll see you later, Lexa."_

"Right. See you." Lexa smiles faintly before hanging up. She turns around to find Octavia watching her with curious eyes. "I hate you."

"You'll thank me when you have mind-blowing sex with Clarke Griffin." Octavia smirks.

Lexa launches a throw pillow at her flatmate before going upstairs.

"You still have yet to introduce me to my future best mate, Lexapedia!"

***

333A.

Lexa repeats the number in her mind the entire way to the Tower to make sure she doesn't end up at a stranger's hotel room with a bouquet of flowers. She has to remind herself not to squeeze the life out of the arrangement half the time. She can't believe she's so nervous. Yet, before she knows it, she's standing before the Dante Suite and knocking.

She expects Clarke to answer the door in all her radiant glory, but instead a sweet-looking shorter man answers the door. "Hi, you must be from Time Magazine. Your editor explained that you'd be late. Come on, we'll get you through to the—"

"Monty!" Her head snaps toward the direction of the voice. The man turns towards the voice as well. "Cancel Time Magazine. They'll be at the press junket this weekend anyway. They can have extra time or whatever."

Confused, he tries to argue. "But, they're right here."

Clarke waves her hand. "That is my five o'clock."

Monty's eyes widen. "My mistake. Miss Woods, correct?"

Lexa nods and shakes his hand. He gestures to a door behind Clarke. "Let me lead you to the other room. Clarke has one more interview to do and she'll be in to join you shortly." He opens the door and she walks in. "Please, make yourself comfortable and help yourself to water or tea."

"Thank you. Monty, right?"

He smiles sweet and sincere, giving her a thumbs up. "Yes, ma'am. Let me know if you need anything while you wait. I apologize for the mixup earlier."

"No worries. I'll wait for Clarke here." Lexa sits in one of the chairs and restlessly switches holding the bouquet between her left and right hand. No more than ten minutes later, Clarke comes through the door and shuts it behind her.

A little breathless, the blonde explains. "I'm sorry. I thought we'd be done with all this by the time you got here."

Lexa shrugs. "Well, then, I feel bad for the blokes at Time Magazine." She stands up and hands Clarke the flowers. "These are for you." She takes pause to frown when she notices the arrangements scattered about the room. "I reckon they don't quite size up."

Clarke smiles wide and bright, reaching her eyes, when she takes the bouquet from Lexa's hand. "These are beautiful. Thank you." She clears her throat when she places them in a vase. She takes the chair across from Lexa. "I, uhm, wanted to apologize for my behavior the other day. I didn't mean to jump you like I did."

Lexa, a little disappointed, still forces a small stoic smile like she hadn't spent every day since wondering if it could happen again. She knew it was too good to be true. "Consider it forgiven." Lexa pauses. "Allow me to say that the past few days seem like a dream I can't wake up from."

The blonde tilts her head. "A good dream, I hope?"

"Probably the best dream I've ever had."

Clarke tucks a hair behind her ear. "So, in your dream, what would Lexa Woods do next?"

Steeling herself and visibly swallowing, Lexa confesses. "I'd, uh, gather up the courage to ask if you were free tonight."

"How would Clarke Griffin respond to such a daring question?" A sly smile on her face, Clarke leans forward ever so slightly— enough for Lexa to feel some overwhelming sense of boldness.

"I guess I'd have to ask to find out?" Lexa swallows her nerves as Clarke subtly nods at her. "Would you...be free?"

Clarke shakes her head, at which Lexa visibly deflates. "I have some arranged plans tonight, unfortunately."

And Lexa is ready to bolt and let them go their separate ways. "Right. Of course."

That is until Clarke speaks again. "But, I am free tomorrow night."

She stares at Clarke, who seems to be too shy to look back at her, searching for there to be a catch somewhere.

***

Octavia Blake [6:43pm]: hey, you took off before I could catch you. are we meeting at anya's for the bday festivities for lincoln?

Lexapedia [6:44pm]: Shit. That's tonight?

Octavia Blake [6:45pm]: duh, you've only been reminding me for the past month. so where is it, lex?

Lexapedia [6:46pm]: At Anya's.

Octavia Blake [6:47pm]: be there or be square, woods!

"Bugger me!" Lexa curses, throwing her head back to look at the night sky.

"I hope that's you being nervous." Clarke manages a guess as she approaches Lexa outside the Tower lobby. "And not because you double-booked me with some other girl."

Lexa sighs and smiles apologetically. "I did double-book you, but not with some other girl."

"An approachable bloke, then?" Clarke quirks an teasing smile, standing in front of Lexa now.

"My brother." Lexa cringes. "It's his birthday and our friends normally have tea to celebrate. And you couldn't possibly want to go." At this point, Lexa's practically pacing and rambling to no one in particular. "I could cancel...make it up to him—"

"—Lexa. Hey. It's okay." Clarke places her hands on the taller girl's shoulders. Lexa immediately stops her frantic movements to stare down at reassuring blue eyes.

"No, I’m sure I can get out of it."

"I meant, I'd love to be your date to your brother's birthday."

"Really?" Lexa stares at the blonde. "As my date?"

Clarke smiles at her and takes her hand. "Yeah, I'd love to." She gives Lexa's hand a gentle squeeze. "Just lead the way."

***

"Okay, I have to warn you. My friends get a little mental when they're all together." She sighs when they get to Anya's front doorstep. "There's still no excuse for Octavia."

Clarke nods. "So, should I knock on the door or are you gonna do that?"

Lexa rolls her eyes and opens the door for Clarke. "Hey, guys. Sorry I'm late!"

There's some cheers that can be heard from beyond the hallway. "Lexapedia's here!"

"Good thing you're here, Lex. We were about to get on with tea without you! Oy! I was kidding! Lincoln's not even here yet!" Raven calls out again. "We're in the lounge!"

Lexa leads Clarke into the living room. "Hey, guys. This is Clarke." Everyone immediately shuts up as Clarke looks around the room,  while Lexa introduces Anya, Octavia, Bellamy and finally Raven. "This is Raven."

Raven, leaning against the counter and tapping relentlessly on her leg brace, nods at the blonde. "Sup!"

"Nice to meet all of you." Clarke says, polite and warm as ever.

"We're about to play charades!" Octavia announces, literally bouncing in front of Clarke. "I'll bet you're amazing at it."

"I guess you guys will be the judge of that." Clarke shrugs, holding her own against Lexa's friends.

After two rounds of getting absolutely demolished by Team Clexa, as the group had appointed them, Bellamy declared truce. "Alright, alright. I give up! It's not fair you got an actress as a partner, Lex."

"Bugger that. Don't mind him." Octavia quips as she jumps onto Bellamy's back. "He just fancies himself a sore loser."

"As if being a sore loser isn't in the Blake genes?" He raises an eyebrow at her sister.

Octavia flicks his forehead. "I don't mind losing to Clarke."

"It's not good to lie, little Blake." Raven calls out from the kitchen. 

Clarke quirks an eyebrow when she looks at Lexa who just shrugs at her friends' current shenanigans. "This is a tame night. You should see them play Mario Kart."

Octavia hops off of Bellamy's back. "Nah, really! It's fine. We ought to be best mates, isn't that right, Clarke?"

Lexa laughs, grabbing a wine glass from Anya. "You don't have to answer that. O's just a tad bit hyper."

Octavia huffs and crosses her arms when Bellamy tries to ruffle her hair. "Bloody oath! We're platonic soulmates."

Clarke, amused as ever, decides to play along. "You feel it, too?"

"You bitch!" Raven cries out. "I had reckoned I was your platonic soulmate!"

"Maybe in another universe, Reyes." Octavia throws a wink over to the girl by the counter. "You're still my alcoholic soulmate, though."

"Bunch of two-pot screamers, you both are." Anya deadpans, momentarily turning her attention away from what's cooking on the stove.

Clarke turns to Lexa with a question. "Two-pot screamers?"

"I reckon Americans refer to it as 'lightweights'." Lexa explains with a chuckle.

Clarke nods, and they turn their attention to Anya again. "Lincoln's on his way so can you all settle down?"

Raven raises her glass to Octavia, winking at her to annoy Anya. Clarke is giggling on the couch and Lexa has to bury her face into a pillow until Clarke throws an arm around her and she relaxes.

Suddenly, they all hear the door close and they all know who it is. "Happy birthday!"

"Hey, guys! Sorry, I'm late. My last appointment ran long." Lincoln announces when he walks into the living room. His eyes immediately fall to Lexa, who hasn't disentangled herself from Clarke. "I see you don't miss me."

Lexa gets up and hugs her brother. He twirls her around. "Happy birthday, Linc."

"It's good to see you, Lex." He grins down at her as he sets her down. "You gonna introduce me to your friend?"

Clarke is there before Lexa can speak for her. "Hi, I'm Clarke." She shakes his hand. "Happy birthday!"

"Thanks heaps! I hope our friends have been nice to you." He winks, and Lexa rolls his eyes.

"Between you and me..." She leans in to whisper. "I kicked their asses at charades, so they have to be nice to me."

He grins even wider at his sister. "I'm quite keen on her already, Lex." Then he turns to fistbump the blonde. "Sounds like you'll fit right in."

"There's the birthday boy!" Octavia exclaims as she's barreling towards him. Lexa pulls Clarke out of the way so Lincoln can catch the tiny force that's Octavia Blake.

***

Clarke excuses herself to the bathroom, leaving Lexa's friends to bombard Lexa with questions.

Anya says calmly. "Where the hell do you come off bringing Clarke Griffin to dinner?"

Octavia pipes up. "Yeah, what the hell, Lex? Did you get a bounty out for her or something?"

"You paid her, didn't you?" Bellamy asks before Octavia punches him hard on the arm.

"Seriously, how did you manage this?" Raven asks, ignoring the Blakes.

Lexa shrugs while Lincoln throws an arm around her sister. "It's the Woods' charm, ain't it, Lex?" He throws a wink over in Octavia's general direction, but it goes unnoticed by everyone else.

"Something short of a miracle, I reckon." Lexa mumbles.

***

"You do _not_ get to have the last brownie, Bell." Octavia wines. "Besides, I'm the one with the worst taste in men and women alike, and God only knows why Lexa even tries to put up with me."

Lincoln nods, now acting as the peacekeeper. "Fair point, O. Bell's out of the running then." He ignores Bellamy's scowl and then turns to Raven. "What about you, Reyes?"

"Oh, bugger off. I haven't been able to feel my left leg since I was eighteen. If I were to film all the pity glances I get at the auto shop, I could make a bloody documentary." She sighs and then takes Anya's hand. "And my wife can't stand to leave me home alone for more than 45 minutes." Anya, looking apologetic, peppering kisses on her knuckles.

"O's out of the running, too." Lincoln doesn't take too long to ponder Raven's argument, and instead turns his attention to his sister, making Lexa feel so vulnerable all of a sudden. "But, at least you're not Lexa."

Everyone at the table, except Clarke, nod in agreement— all obviously privy to Lexa's life in a way Clarke isn't. Lexa holds her chin up. "What? My life isn't that bad."

"Oh, please." Anya starts, scoffing, and tossing a piece of leftover bread at her best friend. "That candle shop is a poor excuse of a career, despite your..." Anya places air quotes. "Passion or what have you."

"Let's not forget your refusal to invest in contacts." Bellamy says, reaching over Lincoln and poking at Lexa's glasses.

She rolls her eyes and readjusts them, catching Clarke's curious gaze in the process.

Lincoln joins in, too. "You also live in a house that you bought with your ex-wife, which you refuse to move out of, even after she left you."

"Forced to take the lowest of pickings in the housemate pool." Raven nods at Octavia, who just flips her off.

Then Octavia adds her two cents. "And we wonder if you'll ever be happy again."

"Okay, enough. I get it." Lexa almost snarls. "But I get the last brownie, right?"

When she has the brownie in hand, Clarke speaks up. "Well, what about me?"

Lexa blinks owlishly while Octavia howls with laughter. "Wait, you _think you_ deserve the brownie?"

"A fair chance at it, at least?"

Bellamy grins. "Alright, Princess, let's see what you got."

Clarke blinks rapidly. "My mother hates that I never became the second Dr. Griffin in the family and disowned me the moment I turned 18. I spent what would've been my college years wondering if she was right about me being a disgrace, living on little to nothing until I got my first gig 2 years later.  I had no friends, not close ones at least, not ones that would stick around when there was a drought in my publicity. And I wonder if one day everyone around me will realize I'm just a passing star with more luck than talent in this industry."

Everyone at the table is quiet for a few moments…until everyone simultaneously boos.

"I guess I don't even have that much luck, either." Clarke sighs, but is unable to look convincing.

"Not even close, Princess." Bellamy laughs at her, elbowing Lincoln who joins in on the laughter as well.

"For the valiant effort, I'll give you a piece." Lexa tilts her head, breaking off a corner and handing it to the blonde.

"Oh, that's just weak, Commander." Raven whines, rolling her eyes.

"Comes with keeping peace, my dear mechanic." Lexa makes a face at Raven.

Clarke quirks an eyebrow at Lexa. "Commander?"

Lexa just busies herself with finishing the brownie, ignoring the blush threatening to spread across her cheeks.

Anya snickers. "We were in primary school and were playing war with the other kids in class. It was the biggest 'battle' of the school year, you know, the one to end all battles. Lexa decides to color her face in black marker and a put one of those circle stickers on her forehead and call herself Commander." Anya clears her voice to imitate a child's voice. "I call upon the 12 classes to lay waste on the bullies of this playground."

Clarke coos at Lexa who's the only one that isn't laughing at the table. "That's adorable." She turns to Anya. "Did she win?"

Anya grins, looking at Lexa proudly. "She bloody did. Along with two weeks of recess detention, but it was worth it, right, Lex?"

Lincoln urges her. "Come on, Lex. It's your legacy."

Everyone turns to look at Lexa, who rolls her eyes, as if egging her on to say something. She sighs, dejected.  She lifts her chin, in some showcase of pride. "Blood must not have blood."

"The rest of primary school was quite an era of peace." Lincoln notes, grinning at his sister. "Even when I got there the year after Lex left."

***

"It was nice meeting you, Clarke!" Lexa's friends call after them as they're led out the door by Anya. When the door closes, Clarke and Lexa hears them just let out a unified squeal.

Lexa winces. "They're all a bunch of wankers. They do that every time I leave a party."

Clarke shakes her head, but takes Lexa's hand anyway. "They were great. They all love you."

"They are great." Lexa smiles, sneaking a glance at Clarke in the moonlight. "So, I take it you had fun?"

"Heaps." Clarke throws her a smile as Lexa bumps shoulders with her. Clarke clears her throat. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"What happened to Raven?"

Lexa sighs before explaining. "Frightening car accident in secondary school. T-boned at a busy intersection. The guy was drunk, and he didn't make it. And Raven, well, she barely made it out alive."

"Did you know her then?"

"No." Lexa shakes her head. "I went to business school with Anya. Raven fixed her vehicle once and…the rest, as they say, is history." 

Clarke hums. "They seem good for each other."

"Yeah." Lexa agrees, giving Clarke's hand a gentle tug. "Come on."

"Where are we going?"

"Anywhere."

"You're a cheeseball—" Clarke giggles, but then stops abruptly when something catches her attention, causing Lexa to follow her gaze.

"What?" Lexa realizes what Clarke is staring at. "Oh, those are little private villages throughout Polis Metro. Quite lovely communities."

Clarke points to the park beyond the tall gate. "We should go in."

"In there?" Lexa sputters.  "We're not allowed in."

"And why not?" The blonde is currently sizing up how to get over the fence.

"It's for residents only." Lexa explains. "I don't recall either of us being residents here."

Clarke rolls her eyes. "Come on, Lex. Live a little." Lexa crosses her arms. "What? Are you afraid?"

Yes. "Absolutely not." Lexa takes a look around. The neighborhood is quiet. So, she takes a breath. "Right. I'll just—" She hoists herself up onto the brick wall and tries to pull herself up the metal fence, only failing to garner a decent grip. She clumsily falls back down, barely landing on her own two feet. "—Whoopsie daisies!"

Clarke laughs, loud and pure. "Wait—"

Lexa tries again...and fails. Again. "—Whoopsie daisies!"

Clarke bursts into laughter again, louder this time. "You just said 'whoopsie daisies'. " Clarke covers her mouth with her hand only to fail at holding back yet another laugh. "Twice."

Lexa doesn't acknowledge the blush creeping up her neck. "No, I didn't."

"Yeah, that's what I thought." Clarke raises an eyebrow as she hoists herself up the gate.

"Exactly, because only little old ladies that grew up in the 1950's say that." Lexa explains, barely defending what's left of her reputation.

"Yeah, yeah, Grandma!" Clarke calls out when she makes it over the fence. "Come on, you need to see this."

Lexa tries a third time to make it over. This time far more successful, albeit far less graceful. "Is this really worth getting arrested over?"

Clarke waits for Lexa joins her, intertwining their hands and looking out to what seems like an endless green field. Clarke turns slightly towards Lexa and leans in for a kiss, leaving them both breathless when they realize where they are. They walk mindlessly through the private property, hand in hand, shy and smiling.

Until finally, they happen upon a bench with some engraving that Clarke reads aloud to her: "Some people meet the way the sky meets the earth, inevitably, and there is no stopping or holding back their love. Louise Erdrich." Lexa lets that sink and settle somewhere deep in her bones, a tiny reminder that something bigger than them seems to be at play here.  And before Lexa can make any sense of the notion, Clarke whispers carefully. "Like soulmates." Clarke takes a seat at the bench and calls out to the brunette. "Sit with me."

And she does, because how could she not? How could she imagine herself in any other place than here? With anyone else but her? Like this is what they deserve in every universe.

***

"O, have you seen my glasses?" Lexa calls out, frantically turning the place upside down to find her glasses.

Octavia grunts from her spot on the sofa. "Who am I, your mother? It's not my fault you keep forgetting where you put your shit when you get back from your dates with Clarke."

"We've only been out twice after the dinner. Besides, she's leaving in two days. And it was a simple question." Lexa retorts still rushing around their shared spaces. "I seemed to have misplaced all my spares and I'm bloody late."

"Actually, there's one in the kitchen drawer."

Lexa stops in her tracks. "Octavia, I told you to throw those out."

Octavia smirks. "I thought you said needed glasses. You can't see for shit even if you sat front row at the movies."

"I hate you." Lexa grabs them and heads towards the door.

"You love me!" Octavia calls after her. "You're welcome!"

Lexa arrives late, and it takes all of two seconds for Clarke to notice her new thicker-rimmed glasses. "You're late. Cute glasses, Commander."

"Please don't. Octavia was being insufferable before I left."

"I can't believe they make raccoon glasses for adults."

"My friends are wankers so they got them custom made with my prescription."

Clarke lets her buy popcorn to make up for being late. She also kept flicking the side of Lexa's adorable glasses throughout the movie—Clarke's movie.  She whispers when the lights come back after the movie concludes, placing a kiss on her cheek. "I think they're cute."

***

"What am I doing with you?" Clarke asks out of nowhere as they walk through the only art museum in Polis Metro.

Lexa looks surprised, her eyes wide. "I don't know. You tell me."

Clarke stands in front of a piece that resembles too much of a Pollack for her taste, studies it for a second more, and then turns to Lexa. "How come you never talk about her?"

"About who?" Lexa whispers, confused what the painting has to do with a 'her'. Clarke just shoots her a look. "Oh, Costia."

"So, that's her name." Clarke says. "What happened?"

"Nothing, really. She was mine and I was fully content with that. Turns out, I wasn't really hers." Lexa shrugs despite her solemn tone. "We married young and she became unhappy and unable to continue being married with someone she grew out of loving."

Clarke takes her hand and squeezes it gently. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be." Lexa smiles at her even if it doesn't quite reach her eyes.

***

"You're telling me you wouldn't be a doctor  if you weren't an actress?" Lexa asks on their way out of the museum building.

Clarke says, bumping shoulders with the brunette. "That's exactly what I'm saying."

"What would you be then?"

"A starving artist."

"Weren't you already that when you started out?" Lexa asks, a little confused.

Clarke scoffs, swatting her arm. "You judge, but there's a fair degree of expression there."

"You're full of absolute shit, Clarke Griffin."

"I'm serious. Drawing and painting is one of my hobbies."

"You know how much money you could make off of making art and selling it to your fans…you know, being Clarke Griffin." Lexa teases, taking Clarke's hand and leading her down the footpath.

"That's rich coming from someone who lives off selling candles for a living."

***

There's a buzz of something electric in the air when they approach the Tower at the end of the night, something that just radiates off of Clarke in a soft glow in the dim streetlights.

"Let's do something spontaneous." Clarke says, staring up at the tall building.

Lexa tilts her head. "Like what?"

"Let's just run away."

"Yes, that is the most viable option right now, Clarke." Lexa says in a deadpan.

Clarke just surges forward and kisses her deep and meaningful. "Come up, then?"

Something inside of Lexa's chest swells and fills her lungs with something she can't deny even if she tried. "Okay." She whispers, and Clarke beams. The blonde presses one last peck to her lips before skipping off.

She calls over her shoulder. "Give me five minutes."

She waits and waits until five minutes are up before following suit. Her heart races as she knocks on the door and Clarke rushes to open it. She places a quick kiss to Clarke's lips before walking into the suite.

"Lex—"

"—I just have to say what a feeling it is to be able to do that—

"—You have to go—"

"—I...what?" Lexa doesn't mask her confusion for anything else. She furrows her eyebrows and waits for Clarke to explain.

"Just go. _Please._ " Clarke is begging and Lexa can't fathom why.

There's some movement in the suite behind Clarke, and suddenly a floppy-haired guy emerges from the other room. "Hey, babe. Who's at the door?"

Lexa's heart freefalls and shatters into somewhere in her gut. He's got his shirt off and he's walking around the room as if he has a place in Clarke's suite, in Clarke's life.

Clarke tries to explain, but Lexa decides to step in with an explanation for her own foolishness. "Uh, room service."

The guy just looks her over. "Don't you guys normally have the penguin suits or something?"

Clarke tries to interrupt. "No, she's—"

Lexa's expression turns stoic. "I'm on the end of my shift. Reckoned I'd ask if you'd need anything before I go."

"That's just swell. You don't get this kind of service in Arkadia." He wraps his arms around Clarke's waist and kisses her on the cheek. "I'm gonna ask for some ice water. You want anything? You should tell her." He busies himself with something and then emerges with a trash bin.

"No, I'm good." Clarke can't seem to make eye contact with Lexa.

"Here." He passes the garbage to Lexa who takes it one arm and turns to leave. "Oh, wait. Almost forgot." He hands her a wad of cash. "I absolutely appreciate it." He walks into the other room again and calls out. "Don't forget to close the door!"

"He's supposed to be in America." Clarke whispers. She seems genuine enough, something more behind those blue eyes that resemble fear and apology and anguish. 

Lexa winces, slowly backing away to the open door despite being unable to look away from Clarke's  guilty expression. "I reckon this is reality coming in to check on both of us." Time for them to check out of whatever dream they deluded themselves into.

"Lex…I don't know what to say…"

"I think even Americans say goodbye, Clarke." And she closes the door behind her.

Lexa walks slowly down the hall, handing the garbage bin to someone in a penguin coat at the end of the hall. She can't recall the last time her heart felt this heavy or ever felt more of a fool than in that moment.

***

_Clarke Griffin remains busy with press, projects and personal prince charming back home in Arkadia._

***

"You all knew?!" Lexa cries out when her friends hear the news that Clarke left to go back to America...with a boyfriend she didn't know existed.

Octavia outwardly cringes. "We thought you knew."

"Yeah, or had some, you know, arrangement of sorts." Lincoln offers weakly, patting a hand on her shoulder.

"This would happen to me." Lexa rubs her hand into her face. "Just because I don't read gossip magazines or troll social media like Octavia."

"I don't read that shit either, Lex, and I knew." Anya scoffs, no apology in her tone.

"Let's look on the bright side, Lexapedia." Octavia suggests. "I no longer hold the title of having the worst taste in women."

"Octavia!" Everyone, but Raven, exclaims at the same time.

Raven actually high-fives her, despite Anya rolling her eyes at the both of them.

***

Lexa goes back to the shop and her usual activities in the following year. She tries dating, which fails because all she can think of are blue eyes and blonde hair. The same face on the billboards or the magazines or adverts on public transportation. She watches all of Clarke's films, sometimes with Octavia and sometimes without.

The seasons pass, just like the colors in Polis Market.

Her life falls back into the mundane pace it had before Clarke, or so she thought.

***

The doorbell buzzes the moment Lexa brushes her teeth one morning. "O, can you get that?" She hollers and waits for two beats before sighing and deciding that her flatmate isn't home.

She rushes down the stairs and opens the door, her jaw dropping when she recognizes who's at the door. "Uh, hi."

"Can I come in?" Her voice cracks and she looks borderline disheveled, so all Lexa can manage is to step aside and let the blonde in.

_Clarke Griffin caught in the middle production conspiracy. Career on blast. Details to follow._

"Some person at the bar thought it would be hilarious to film my outward disdain towards the idiot Executive Producer I was working with and then post it on social media." Clarke pulls her hand through her hair when Lexa brings her a cup of tea. "Spread like wildfire."

"Well, it can't be that bad."

"I was drunk so I called him a fuckwad, among other things, and that I hope the movie sinks to the bottom of the ocean."

Lexa leans back against the kitchen counter. "Colorful choice of words, mate. Good on ya."

Clarke laughs bitterly. "I think it's a breach of contract, so Monty's doing a shit ton of damage control on my behalf. I just need a place to hide away for a bit and hope the start of production is close enough so I don't cost the production company twice my salary to replace my inappropriate ass."

"Well, you're welcome to stay here. I'm sure your platonic soulmate won't mind." Lexa offers, though not making any eye contact with the blonde. "And who would be daft enough to replace you?"

"I have to be back in America next week." Clarke sighs. "Until then, I have to figure out this stupid script." She waves a thick packet around.

"I could run through some lines with you, if you want?"

Clarke looks at her curiously, like she's trying to figure her out, but Lexa doesn't pay it any mind. She also ignores the weird leap of her heart when Clarke finally cracks a smile at her.

***

"The machines keep closing any open ports I try to access. I can't get around the damn PHP." Lexa reads from the script.

Clarke's waving her hands about while she paces across the length of Lexa's small balcony. "Well, that's just perfect. Jerry, get one of the code monkeys from website department to decipher that god-forsaken language. Mindy, how fast can you create a bootstrap? We need to get them to trust us, or the whole world will be victim to a nuclear apocalypse."

"About thirty minutes, depending on how adamant the machines are about us touching their internal code."

"Go. Do it." Clarke raises her voice. "Foster! Get a hold of my sister and tell her to get to the bunker behind my house.  She knows which one. She can take Tommy there. They'll be safe there. She cannot under any circumstances open the door for anyone until it's safe."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Garrett! See if there's any way we can delay the search the machines are doing in the military's personal database. Wildcards. Appended linked-lists. Recursive Loops. Anything."

"I’m on it."

"Do not tell me how many mistakes I made. I will actually spit in your face." Clarke groans when Lexa remains quiet. "What do you think?"

Lexa chuckles and sets the script down. "Well, it's not Austen, but it's definitely quite gripping."

"Right, like I could book a gig like that."

"You should try out a period film. Jane Austen or something. Give it a go." Lexa suggests, shrugging. "Test your limits. Just please stay away from Tolstoy adaptations."

"You're such a lit snob." Clarke rolls her eyes. "But we'll see if Joe Wright wants to book me for an Austen adaptation. Hopefully he won't think I'll call him a fuckwad." Clarke takes a seat next to Lexa and tilts her head back. "Besides, you might be the only target audience."

"You could do like black leather motorcycle hottie in a zombie apocalypse?"

Clarke grabs the script from Lexa and hits her with it.

***

Lexa reads her novel quietly or at least tries to. She can't help but glance over at Clarke, whose brow keeps furrowing in concentration at whatever she's writing in her notebook. She almost misses Clarke looking at the tattoo on her right arm. Almost.

"How many tattoos do you have?" Clarke asks, finally breaking the silence and Lexa's miserable attempt at staying focused on her novel.

"Two." Lexa says matter-of-factly, except not lifting her eyes.

"Can I see the other one?"

The front door shuts and they hear Octavia holler through the hallway. "It's on her back!"

If they know that Octavia walks through the lounge room with a knowing smirk, they don't show it. Clarke, surprisingly flustered by the new bit of information, busies herself with her notebook. Lexa buries her nose into her book again. Octavia remains to be insufferable, though. That much doesn't change.

"Are you drawing Lexa?" Octavia exclaims as she passes behind Clarke.

"I-uh-it's not-" Clarke's at a loss for words when Lexa catches her gaze.

Clarke's trepidation is enough for Lexa's head to snap up. The blonde isn't quick enough to close her notebook when Octavia makes a motion to grab it. She stares at the page, a smirk growing menacingly full. Octavia bounces over to Lexa, handing the notebook over.

"Octavia, I'm sure Clarke would like to keep her drawings private." Lexa says, not taking the notebook. "Don't be rude to our guest."

"But Lex!" Octavia is practically whining in protest, like a petulant child.

"It's not quiet finished yet." Clarke admits quietly.

Lexa locks a gaze with blue eyes for a split second before Clarke clears her throat and tries to look anywhere else. She finally takes a peek at the notebook and Octavia grins between them. Clarke drew Lexa reading, perched on the sofa like she had been for the past two hours, with so much detail on her tattoo and so much detail in her eyes that Lexa is left speechless.

***

Lexa tosses and turns on the sofa that night, unable to push the thought of Clarke's drawing of her from earlier. A curiosity that she can't put to rest unless faced with it head on, she supposes.  And it's not until she hears shuffling feet that she notices that Octavia's watching her have some kind of internal struggle on the sofa.

She growls lowly. "O, go to bed."

"I'm just getting my headphones."

"Since when do you use headphones?"

Octavia shoots her a knowing look. "Since my vibes can tell that you two lonely love birds will finally quit this dance and bang each other finally."

"It's not like that. And you know it." Lexa crosses her arms and stares up at the ceiling, unable to look at her friend when she's insinuating stuff like that. "She just needs somewhere to stay."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night, Lexapedia."

"Octavia, I swear to god…"

"Alright, alright." Octavia throws one last attempt over her shoulder. "I'm just saying the opportunity is right upstairs. All you have to do is take it." She pauses. "With her consent of course."

"Octavia!"

"I'm going. I'm going." And like that, Octavia disappears to her room.

Lexa internally curses her friend and shuts her eyes to will herself to sleep. That is until she hears more shuffling feet and she outwardly groans. "Will you bugger off for Christ's sake?"

She expects some kind of snark from Octavia, but it's Clarke's apologetic voice instead. "Geez, alright. Sorry."

Lexa's eyes snap open. "Wait, wait. I'm sorry. I thought you were Octavia." She jumps off the sofa and stands up to face Clarke. "I'm glad it's you." She admits. She can feel the hesitation in Clarke's body language. "Clarke." She says in the softest tone possible, like her name is the only prayer she knows.

Clarke takes a careful step toward her, the light from the window bathing her in faint moonlight. Lexa doesn't think she could look any more beautiful. Lexa moves closer too, pulling her hair over one shoulder— a sad, nervous thing she does when she's feeling as vulnerable as she does now. She looks at Clarke with a soft, wide-eyed expression, holding her breath in anticipation of everything Clarke. In this moment, she's at Clarke's mercy, at Clarke's whim. And she'd give willingly, even if she spent months wondering if Clarke would actually take what she had to offer— what could threaten to consume them both in a dangerous wreck.

Clarke moves first, of course, as Lexa had learned in the course of their relationship thus far—Clarke acts with brazen recklessness and Lexa reacts with a guarded awe. So, when Clarke pushes forward to kiss her, her hands tentatively land in Clarke's hair…just in case Clarke disappears if she touches her too fast, too eager, too much, like their time is running out.

But Clarke doesn't dissipate into thin air and Lexa continues to melt into her touch, continues to gaze into Clarke's blue eyes with the same astonishment one would have staring directly into the deepest galaxy.

***

Lexa vaguely wakes up as Clarke calmly strokes her arm. She opens her eyes, relief washing over her when she feels the warmth from Clarke's body behind her, spooning her. She takes a deep breath, and Clarke takes the opportunity to trace her finger down the tattoo on her back.

"This is beautiful." Clarke whispers in awe. "Does it have a story?"

"I got it after Costia left. It's a symbol of falling from grace, in a way. How it can still be beautiful." Lexa turns over, so Clarke can't see it anymore. "But I'd rather not talk about it."

"We don't have to talk at all." The corner of Clarke's mouth pulls into a teasing smile and Lexa obliges her with a kiss.

***

"Lex, someone's at your door." Clarke says, placing a kiss on her shoulder. "And I want some tea."

"Shhhh." Lexa responds lazily, eyes still closed.

Clarke lets out a low chuckle. "You get the door and I'll boil some water."

Lexa finally gets up and pulls on one of her oversized tees. She turns to smile at Clarke who's wearing one of her large button down shirts. "It's spectacularly unfair that you get to look _that_ good in my clothes."

"More where that came from." Clarke smiles. "That is if I can…stay longer?"

"Stay forever."

Clarke presses a kiss to her lips. "Come on. The door."

Lexa does answer the door, only to find the entire Australian press with flashing cameras at her front doorstep. She quickly shuts the door and leans against it. And she doesn't have enough time to process what just happened to stop Clarke from opening the door.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" Clarke pushes past Lexa and to phone. "Monty, they found me. Great, thanks."

She's already halfway up the stairs when Lexa decides to follow her to the bedroom. "Clarke, come on. It's not a big deal Let's just take a breath and think about this. You know, shake it off."

"This won't be fixed with a fucking Taylor Swift song, Lexa." Clarke spits out. "Of course, you'd take this lightly! You walk out in nothing but a t-shirt and then let me walk out in pretty much the same condition when every camera in Australia is at your doorstep."

"How was I supposed to know I would open the door to paparazzi, Clarke?"

Clarke's already packing her small bag, when Lexa catches up to her, trying desperately to talk her down. "I've been dealing with this kind of shit for 10 years. You've only had what? 10 minutes? Even if there is no excuse for Octavia, you still don't think she has nothing to do with this mess?" And Clarke's already making her way back down the stairs.

"Wait, hold on. That's not fair to me or Octavia. Give me a moment to catch up and help."

"There's nothing you can do to help, Lexa."

"Come on, we'll just laugh about all this next week. I understand you're angry, but give it time and let it blow over."

Just as she reaches for the door, Clarke immediately turns on her heel to face Lexa . "You don't understand, Lexa. I’m a celebrity. Every scandal about me gets archived somewhere in a gossip column or, even worse, somewhere on the internet for the world to see for the rest of my life. This never goes away. So  next time someone looks up my name, they'll know me as the actress who fucked that candle shop owner in Polis Market…when I have a fucking boyfriend."

Lexa looks shell-shocked. "What?"

"As far as they know, we're still together!  So this problem that you want to laugh about has some very real consequences for me, okay?" Clarke sets her shoulders, her eyes cold and distant. "Just another mistake for me to regret."

There's the final blow, the final nail that drives in the very fear that Lexa had been afraid of all this time. She swallows and cages up her heart once more. "If you would just let me think quite the opposite of your sentiments because, believe me, I don't regret it, even if I know it's easier for you to hate me than hate yourself.

Clarke falters only momentarily before her eyes flash with anger again. "Well, I can do both."

Lexa can only watch her leave when she hears Octavia in the kitchen.

"I may or may not have said something down at the pub, Lex." Octavia says, rubbing the back of her neck. "Bellamy wasn't there in time to stop me from—"

"—Don't." Lexa says still staring at the door.

"I'm sorry, Lex."

"I know."

***

 _Clarke Griffin caught cheating on boyfriend in Australia._  

***

Several months pass and Lexa is just tired, at the very least content with a sense of normalcy in Polis Market again. As much as she wishes otherwise, life still goes on.

"I've found someone, Lex."

Lexa smiles. "That's wonderful, Linc."

"She makes me happy."

"I'm happy for you." Lexa says. "Can't wait for you to introduce me to her."

"Yeah, can't wait, Lincoln." Octavia throws them a grin from across the table, winking at Lincoln when Lexa rolls her eyes.

"So, I know you've said you're over her and all that." Lincoln begins, placing a hand over hers at the table, and passes her a magazine. "You don't care that she's back in town?"

"Nah, I— she's what?" Lexa reads the headline over and over again.

_Clarke Griffin turns in her space suit for a colonial dress outside of Polis for an upcoming flick!_

She's not one for fate and universes and soulmates like Octavia is, but, God, if this isn't a sign.

***

So, she just shows up to set…because one day she just borrows Lincoln's car and it takes her to Trikru lands just on the outskirts of Polis.  Luckily, Monty recognizes her when she arrives.

"Miss Woods! We weren't expecting you! I’m sure Clarke would love to see you." Monty turns to security. "Let her in. She's with me."

"Yes, sir."

They open the gate and Lexa gives her thanks before she follows Monty through a cluster of trailers.

"Lexa?" Clarke asks.

Lexa waves weakly, sticking her hands in her back pockets when Clarke doesn't say anything else. She's being called to set and Lexa can only watch her be whisked away.

Monty smiles apologetically. "Come on, you can listen to taping until she's done."

"Yeah, that'd be great." She follows Monty. She's handed a pair of headphones and listens in, but apparently they're in between takes.

_So, who's the chick, Griffin? Brunette. Green eyes. Is that your type?_

_Nobody. Honestly! Shut it, Roan. I don't even know what she's doing here._

_Must be important if she just shows up out of the blue._

_It's probably nothing. And you act as if you don't have women dropping by to set just to see you._

Lexa can't listen anymore and hands off her headphones to the sound engineer. She feels her heart drop again and she doesn’t know how much longer she can set herself up for something like this. She makes her exit quietly and drives back to Polis as fast as legally possible.

Somewhere within a mile of Polis city limits, she decides she's done with putting her hopes up again for a girl who she keeps deluding herself might actually reciprocate her feelings.

***

"Do you take Bed, Bath and Beyond coupons?"

"For the last time, no." Lexa says, adjusting her glasses. "So either buy something or take your leave."

"Alright, sheesh." The customer does leave, thankfully, and Lexa can be left at peace once again.

Anya chuckles from somewhere behind her. "Sounds like you're having a swell day."

"If I could kick him from a tower, I would."

"Since when do you feel that visceral towards customers?" The bell above the door rings again and Lexa doesn't look up from the financial books. Anya clears her throat. "Lex, I think you should take this one."

"Anya, can't you see I'm—"

"—Hi." It's Clarke, dragging in a rather large package behind her.

Anya takes it as a cue for to excuse herself to the back room.

Lexa steps out from behind the front register. "Hi. Uh, what can I do you for?"

"I'm sorry about what happened on set the other day. You must have heard what I said to Roan and he's your typical asshole, honestly. Friendly as he might have come off. I didn't need him having any misconception about us."

"Right. Well, I figured you were busy." Lexa nods. "And what you tell your friends about us is clearly none of my business."

Clarke clears her throat and taps the package next to her. "This has been sitting in my hotel room since I've gotten here, taunting me to just give it to you, but I was too much of a coward. But, then, you showed up yesterday…and I figured…why not?"

"Should I open it now?" Lexa asks, interest suddenly piqued at the mysterious package.

"Oh, God, no." Clarke lets out a shaky breath. "Probably open it at home."

"Is…there anything else?"

"One last request, actually. I would like to see you…a little…" Clarke peeks up at Lexa's curious gaze. "or a lot. If you'd let me."

And Lexa suddenly can't feel her heart beating, that all-too-consuming, overwhelming emotion bubbling up to her chest again. "If I may choose to say "no" to your kind request." Clarke's disposition actually falters, only to be brought up within the same second. Lexa wants to take it back, her heart screaming for relief, but she's reminded of every time she thinks Clarke would be ready to love her back. And fear rears its ugly head. "I'm not sure my poor heart would be able to handle you deciding that you don't feel the same way and fly off to America or god knows where for another year to forget me." It's a lie. Lexa would wait forever, but she's making this decision with her head. And they both know it. "And I would be stuck here faced with every picture, every movie. I wouldn't be able to take it. You being a part of my life, but not the other way around."

Clarke just nods. "Of course. That's fair…and, you know, a good decision." Clarke shuts her eyes and takes a deep breath. "But you have to know, aside from all this cruel fame thing…I'm just a girl, standing in front of a girl. Asking her to love me."

Lexa just stands there, unable to process anything. Like her heart had cut off everything else in her body because every fiber in her being is all too consumed by Clarke Griffin.

Clarke accepts her silence as an answer, nodding and giving her a teary-eyed smile before leaving.

***

  _Clarke Griffin to hold a press conference in Polis!_

***

Lexa opens the package, and she suddenly can't breathe. She lets her friends take a look as she slowly backs away to sit in the closest chair.

"I mean, obviously she screwed up twice. So, she doesn't deserve the third time." Anya offers as comfort, holding Raven's hand, except not really making eye contact with Lexa.

Bellamy tries console her, too. "Yeah, her loss. That painting barely holds any resemblance to your tattoo. It's practically a knock-off."

Raven and Anya nod in agreement. Octavia just looks down at her own hands.

Lincoln walks through the door, looking around at them. "What happened?"

Anya answers because Lexa looks nearly catatonic. "Your sister has decided to turn down Clarke Griffin."

"You're a fool, Lex. An actual daft prick." Everyone stares at him, shocked at his answer. Octavia stands up to calm him down. He continues. "If you want love, you have to go for it." Lincoln says, taking Octavia's hand as he says it.

Lexa lets the words sink in and it's a little while before anyone decides to speak.

"Linc's got a point, Lex." Raven says. "Besides, that's your freaking tattoo on that canvas. If you don't marry her, I will."

"Need I remind you, you're already married!" Anya huffs.

Raven shrugs, grinning at her wife. "I'd be down for sister wives."

Octavia swats Raven on the arm. "Rae, let Lex have this one, yeah?"

The mechanic agrees. "Yeah, Lex, at least she asked you out this time."

"Agreed." Bellamy supplies. "Someone who does that must be nice enough."

"She also said that she's just a girl, standing in front of a girl, asking her to love her." Octavia says, leaning against Lincoln. "It's quite nice."

Lexa holds up her hand to shut them all up. "Enough. Give me a moment to think."

***

Lexa finds herself in the back of a small auditorium, her friends pushing her forward into the crowd.

"How long will you be staying in Polis?" A reporter shouts from near the back.

Clarke takes a moment to think about it, sadness looming behind her eyes. "Nothing would really tie me here. So, not for very long. Once shooting finishes up, I'll be going back to Arkadia."

"What about that Woods chick you were seen with a few months back?"

"I do not expect Miss Woods to have any connection with me going forward." Clarke tries her best to smile this time.

"Sounds like a daft prick!" The man beside her yells out.

Lexa cringes. She deserves that. She raises her hand, and by some miracle, she's actually called on. "What if Miss Woods were to reconsider?"

"Unfortunately, Miss Woods has made her wishes very clear."

She tries again. "What if—"

Monty interrupts her. "—Sorry. One question only please."

"Wait." Clarke says to Monty. "It's alright. Let her finish." She looks directly at Lexa. "Well?"

"What if Miss Woods, realizing she has indeed been a daft prick, got on her knees and promised to never hurt you again, would you, by chance, reconsider?"

Clarke smiles as the reporters start taking note of Lexa among them. Her smile starts to grow wide as she contemplates her answer. Then, finally. "I would." She whispers something inaudible to Monty.

"Alfred, ask your question again."

"Uh, how long will you be staying in Polis?"

Clarke smiles, as if she and Lexa are the only two in the universe, let alone in the room, a moment stolen silently between them, as she answers the question for the second time. "Indefinitely."

**Author's Note:**

> Shout out to Mackenzie for planting this brilliant idea into my head and having to wait 4 months for the idea to actually come into fruition.


End file.
